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Eating Venomous Snakes...
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- Written by: Rod Boyle
- Category: Dreams
- Hits: 1862
Dreaming that I'm somewhere in a jungle or forest, co-workers, not the co-workers I have now, and I'm eating a bowlful of roasted venomous snake, chopped up, only the head is left and I'm wondering if the fangs are poisonous as well as venomous, and wondering if the skull will be all crunchy, dropping it into my mouth I discover it was two headed, the other head still very much alive and grazing my neck, I drop it immediately...
...And wake up..
Ask Siri
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- Written by: Rod Boyle
- Category: Link of the day
- Hits: 1736
IMHO (In My Humble Opinion) this is all the proof we need that machines have achieved sentience, and should be destroyed before the great purge of humanity begins...
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Ranchmans
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- Written by: Rod Boyle
- Category: Miscellany
- Hits: 2628
And the big "night out" with the boys, Saturday, the first of Stampede. G, the new Italian waiter and I set out for Ranchmans after work.
Strange to say, in 20 years of Calgary, I've never been. It's amazing. By which I mean, I'm not a cowboy by a long shot, but they do it up well with all the western props and such, it's a proper hillbilly bar, many a bar outside of Calgary could learn something here. This is what you expect to stumble into in the Bayou or one of those dire pubs hidden in the wastelands of Montana. And, being Stampede, it's packed. Packed with maybe a thousand people, maybe more, hard to guess, all in various stages of inebriation, all held up by the press of the crowd, I've been nominated the designated driver and so the boys take turns buying me diet cokes, and with a sober eye it's hard not to laugh, but still I'm impressed, the new Italian waiter, it's the first time he's been properly out, he's only seen Calgary through the skewed lens of the restaurant, 100 year old dowagers feted by 80 year old children, he's pleasantly astonished: "It's a pussy paradise!!" he tells me, and sets off to find some prey. There's no shortage of prey here, only his tastes range towards the asian, and there's only a few of those here, guarded by rather large pumped boyfriends, I worry a little about the possibility of a brawl.
Not to worry, as hammered as he gets he's too charming to take offense to...
Cue circus music, boys get inebriated, G finds his way home via a girlfriend, I drive the Italian waiter, he's enthused about this bar, wants to come back, solicits my promise to return next Saturday, exactly what I need, more sober nights out, ...
Simmering
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- Written by: Rod Boyle
- Category: Miscellany
- Hits: 2621
And the weather, hot, the car overheating, overheating in the car. Maybe five miles to work, head down 14th Street, then down 20th Avenue, but it takes 20 minutes, half an hour, the lights on 14th aren't synchronized, traffic backs up, you wait in your car, sweating, simmering...
At every intersection - 17th, 12th, 11th, and then again in Kensington there are the bums, the career homeless, staggering into traffic with an old coffee cup, or walking in abject humility between the cars, eyes downcast, cap in hand, every car has it's window down, some are old hands at this, some are new, this panhandling from cars is a new thing, new as in the past 5 years, before then it wasn't a thing at all, now, on 14th at least, they've cornered every intersection.
Sitting in the car as they walk past, avoiding or catching your eye, everyone has their own trick, the thermometer rising, the temperature, early 30's, a menacing haze that promises thundershowers and hail if you can just survive until you get to work ...
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